My name is Libby the Creator of The Emoji Coach and I have been working with adults and children around their emotions now for quite some time.
Below are some top tips on how to help your children around their emotions confidence and self- esteem.
Watch your language!
This is a simple quick tip for you to use and yet it is very effective. Now when I say this, I am talking about how you phrase your words with yourself and your children.
Hiding emotional pain can start when we are children and can be a learnt behaviour.
Children may find it hard to talk about their feelings and may not know how to express themselves without exploding and then getting into trouble.
For parents, it is hard to see your child struggling, and so you may try and make them feel better by distracting them or offering them a lovely biscuit or even saying, “Oh don’t be silly, It’s nothing, You’ll be fine’.
It Is so important to encourage children, young people anyone to talk about their emotions and express themselves.
A great way to help your child with their emotions is to help them change their wording.
Change I am to I feel.
The majority of people when expressing how they feel will say I am angry, or I am sad.
This is where I would say watch both yours and your child’s language.
If your child is telling you how they feel and say “I am angry or sad or worried……When talking to your child, reflect back to them what they’re saying but add the word feel or feeling…… “So you feel Angry”, “so you feel frustrated”
I can see you’re feeling angry or “Yes, I can see how upset you are feeling”
The reason for doing this is it is so much easier to change how you feel when it is a feeling. If you say I am angry, it becomes your identity, where if you say I feel, it is a feeling and can move on a lot faster.
It’s okay to feel a negative feeling as long as we realise that it is just a feeling and we have a choice to change how we feel.
Separate their behaviour from them.
It is so easy to say, you are a naughty boy/girl etc.
So by saying I love you very much, I don’t like your behaviour you are still getting your point across without knocking their self-esteem or instilling that belief in them because if they believe they are naughty, guess what? Yes, they will behave like naughty children and may feel the odd one out in a group of children and it can spiral downwards from there.
Talk about how you feel.
If you’re not feeling great, then talk about how you feel and you can use that as an example of what you did to change that to a positive feeling.
Tell your kids that your feeling like you’re having a bad day, and that’s okay for mummy and daddy to feel like this and isn’t their problem to fix as you will feel good again.
You’re communicating this with them so they won’t feel like they have done something wrong when you’re snappy because let’s face it, we can all be snappy with our kids when we don’t feel 100%
Below are ways to communicate with your child to help with their confidence and self-esteem
I am passionate about helping children to be their true selves, lighting up their paths helping them to see and believe in who they really are so they can reach their true potential and happiness. Helping parents to see how amazing they are helping them to parent from their hearts.
My passion for my work has lead me to sponsor The Wonderful World of Wellbeing Festival. I am a proud sponsor of this event as Emotional wellbeing is crucial for our beautiful children and you the parents and teachers to embrace and learn so you can live a balanced and happy life.
I will be exhibiting and talking at Kempton Park on the 11th and 12th May.
Hope to see you there.